February 17th, 2017.
It is with such a heavy heart that I have to share the news that our beautiful, inspiring and amazing mum has passed away. She died so peacefully in dad’s arms at home on the evening of Wednesday 15th February. We had all been with her moments before.
Mum’s heath had deteriorated rapidly over recent days. While it happened so quickly, it meant that mum didn’t have to worry or be in any discomfort for long and we take so much comfort from that.
The Cancer is Pants campaign helped in so many ways. It showed mum how much people cared and how much love and support there is in the community. It enabled mum to access pioneering treatments that gave her so much hope and improved her quality of life over these past two years. Hope kept us all going and that is what Cancer is Pants gave us. We cannot thank you enough for all of your support, love and kindness and for making the campaign what it was.
As a family we are staying strong as we know that mum will always be with us. She taught us so much in life and we will make sure she continues to teach us in death. While we can’t quite believe she is no longer here, we will go on as she would have wanted us to; together, happy and living life to the full.
Mum was beautiful in life and will continue to inspire us always.
Mum eloquently documented her journey in her blog 'Rudely Interrupted' , which you can read on this site.
In many ways this is her legacy. It is not only her story and that of our family, but it is also a detailed account of all her incredible research and investigation into her illness and the treatments available for it. Already the blog has inspired and helped countless others who are trying to navigate the options after a cancer diagnosis. Mum believed that life was for living and through her brave choices she managed to have a good quality of life in the last two years that no one could have predicted.
This is a small extract from the blog that mum wrote a few months before she died:
Where will Mum go when she dies?
Well, that is a very good question and one Mummy thinks about a lot. Some people believe in heaven, a beautiful and peaceful place. Others believe we are reincarnated, that means we come back as another creature or person. Mummy thinks it must be somewhere in the middle. When you die she thinks it must feel like just falling into a deep, deep sleep but never waking up. Instead we find a kind of peace coming back to life as our cells are reabsorbed by nature. When she dies she will be the wood pigeon. Every time you hear it softly coo it will be Mummy talking to you, telling you she loves you and is watching over you. She will be telling you there is nothing to worry about and that she wants you to love life and be happy. She will also be the breeze, because every little breeze whispers Louise. The breeze that gently blows the trees making the branches bend and the leaves rustle. The breeze that brushes your face as you walk and ruffles your hair when you run. The breeze that wraps itself around you so that you know Mummy is there.
Everywhere you look you will see other Mummies keeping watch over their children. The bees buzzing, a dog barking, water running, cows lowing. They are the rain that trickles down window panes and drips off eye lashes, the clouds, always watchful, playing games in the sky, sometimes making shapes for you to guess what they are, other times covering the earth like a thick cotton wool blanket. Some Mummies are the snow falling silently, tickling your cheeks and freezing your toes. Others the waves on the sea shore, always present, always watching, talking to their children, sometimes, playing with them as they race and jump and whoop, catch me if you can, she will be shouting, ‘I’m coming to get you’ as she whooshes up the shore snapping at their ankles. You can find most Mummies in the light of a candle, flickering and dancing, watching carefully as you stare into the flame. Some Mummies are the blanket that covers you at night, protecting you, keeping you warm, keeping you safe. They are the heather on the moors, the daffodils in the spring, the leaves falling off the trees. They are everywhere. But your Mummy will be the wood pigeon and the breeze and she will follow you all through your life. When you hear her or feel her listen very carefully. She loves you.